People often place themselves in uncomfortable positions by saying yes to anything that is asked of them or they don't know how to take care of themselves in an uncomfortable situation. Often times, when confronted with conflict a person will defeat themselves, because they don't know how to have professional or personal boundaries to alleviate the tension or pressure that is caused by confrontation.

I was once asked to say "no" to anyone and anything that was asked of me for an entire month, even my family. I was asked to say "no" without explanation. So, if someone asked me to help with something, I simply stated that I was sorry, but I was unable to help, but to keep me in mind in the future. Instead of feeling pressured into something and then getting a resentment, I could simply state that I wasn't available.

Professionally, I have been asked to do things that I felt stepped over my personal boundaries and I was grateful that I could say that I wasn't comfortable with that request without explaining myself. I could see the respect level heighten due to my strength of personal boundaries, even in a professional situation.

There are many techniques and tools available to assist people with boundaries. Debra Burnett McKennon, LMC, CPC at CounselingCoach.org looks forward to sharing them with my clients that struggle with self esteem issues, co-dependancy and related issues.